The Lemon’s Top 8 Scariest Halloween Costumes



Halloween Scaries

By Muhammed “Zoinks” Khan & Will “Ruh-Roh” Salzarulo

It is about that time of year when children and adults deem it necessary to dress up and scare one another in an attempt to satisfy their inner monster. In years past, however, we have noticed a terrifying lack of good costumes, much scarier than the costumes themselves. Killer clowns? Goofy. Zombies? Not scientifically likely. Fortnite skull trooper? What?

Due to this disappointment, we have compiled an excellent list of costumes that is sure to make you the scariest individual around.

*We are not liable for any injuries that may be sustained due to the horrifying nature of these costumes. Use this list responsibly.

1. Common House Fly

These terrifying creatures are a real threat to society. Did you know they usually carry at least 65 diseases? This nasty little creature is sure to make others cower in fear of getting dysentery.

2. Teletubbies

This humanoid specimen is sure to send a shiver down the spines of anyone who lays eyes on you. Especially the purple one, as it is clearly a member of the illuminati.

3. Car Insurance Representative

Asking people about their car’s extended warranty is sure to get them running in the opposite direction. Bring a clipboard and pen for maximum effectiveness.

4. Sick Person

Wear a mask and cough a lot, and everybody will be so scared that they’ll stay at least 6 feet away from you.

5. Girl Scout

Try to sell your cookies and everyone will come up with an excuse to leave in an attempt to mask their fear.

6. 500 Apple Core

Apple seeds contain traces of cyanide. Eat enough and you’ll die. Truly alarming.

7. Volcano

Volcanoes are scary! It is the leading cause of death from lava! Truly scary!

8. Brother MFC-J1010DW InkJet Printer

This printer is truly scary. It can print almost anything… EVEN YOUR HOMEWORK!!!