Illegal Activities and News in Haikus

Editor’s Note: The Blip includes short headlines with odd, feel-good, informational, or pointless material. Stories are presented in a fast, easy-to-read format with news that will make you laugh and be enlightened. The Blip is updated often for relevancy.

Woman cooks methamphetamine in a Walmart

A Walmart employee was in for a shock when she confronted a customer about her recent shoplifting of store cosmetics. The St. Louis, MO woman was found cooking a small amount of methamphetamine in a soda bottle inside her purse.

Upon police arrival, a 20-ounce bottle of the substance was found, prompting immediate evacuation of the store. St. Louis County police Lieutenant Mark Cox confirmed these personal “one-and-done” meth batches are becoming increasingly popular, “But taking it into a Walmart is very unusual.”

Read more here.

 

Town meeting to tackle profanity, marijuana, and other annoyances

The town of Middleboro, Massachusetts had a town meeting this morning at 7:30 to vote on bylaw changes. These changes would include fines for public profanity and the use of marijuana in public. The fines include:

$300 for public marijuana use
$50 for shoveling snow onto the street and consuming alcohol in public
$20 for public profanity and disorderly conduct

For more changes to this small town, please click here.

 

Georgia toothpick thief strikes

Police of Athens, GA are investigating the theft of about 400,000 toothpicks (worth almost $3,000, believe it or not) from a manufacturer.

Six cases were taken from Armond’s Manufacturing Company Incorporated on one occurrence, and another seven cases on a separate incidence. Each case has 288 packages with 100 toothpicks each.

There are no indications of forced entry, but two employees claim they saw a man selling their brand’s toothpicks at a flea market.

Read more here.

 

News in Haikus

It’s time once more for News in Haikus! The world’s most definitive source for relevant news headlines neatly bundled within a 5-7-5 syllable structure framework. Click on each link to read the original news story. The following haikus are written by Joseph L.A. Hall and may be copied and used for whatever purposes wanted, provided credit is given.

The president said,
“Private sector’s doing fine.”
That was a bad move.

Adopt-A-Highway
Has a brand new applicant…
Knights of Ku Klux Klan

The Confederate
Museum needs your help, guys!
Identify pics.